Life can be fascinating...

The Riverboat Days

During my son Eric’s college days he played solo gigs on most weekends at a place downtown that was called The Riverboat Bar and Grill. It was a period of time between the end of a cover band he played in for years, called Method to Madness and the beginning of a band he was in for many years, called The Ugli Stick.

During those young days we had many experiences as we enjoyed large crowds at his shows. He played only cover songs in those Riverboat days; he was not yet seriously focused on songwriting at that time. 

Things got pretty wild from time to time at the Riverboat. These young people were spreading their wings and learning to fly. Some learned quickly and others were struggling, eventually there were those who crashed and burned, while others found their wings and soared.

One young lady came to me one day at a gig and she began to talk. She was someone I recognized from many shows she attended. I had talked to her briefly, on many occassions. She had the most beautiful blonde hair that flowed way down her back and it shined in the light and bounced as she walked by. Those big brown eyes of hers sparkled with excitement about life as she told her stories of things that had happened. Her outlook on everything was uplifting to me. She had a perfect shape and her clothes always accentuated her figure. Often she wore things that revealed her cleavage which I had gotten accustomed to seeing on young ladies those days. The styles then and now seem focused on saying “look at my boobs, they are right here!” She was proud of them, it was obvious.

This particular evening as I sat alone listening to the music, she hopped into the chair next to me and began to talk. She seemed unusually heavy in her thoughts. She scooted up next to me, so close that I felt a little strange, but I could sense that she had something to say so I stayed put to hear it. 

Suddenly she blurted out, “I have a pretty bad situation and I can’t tell anyone about it”.

I sat there, in deep thought about her words, but waited silently as I knew there was more coming. “My parents would not understand and would be very disappointed in me, so I could never talk to them”, she said this with her head dropping, perhaps in embarrassment. I said, “Oh, I am sure it is not that bad.” I added, “You would be surprised about the unconditional love of parents, they would understand more than you might think.”

“Not my parents!” she exclaimed, as she sipped on her Corona, I could see the glimmer of tears welling up in her eyes. I patted her hand and told her even though she may not believe it now, I was sure that her life would be fine; this was just a little stepping stone and not a road block, (though I had no clue what it was we were discussing, I did know she was deeply saddened by it).

Finally she took a very deep breath and blurted out, “I am pregnant!” I looked over at her to hear the rest of the story. She continued to explain that the pregnancy was not the REAL problem, it was part of the problem. The most concerning issue was paternity of the baby.“The father is either my brother’s best friend or it is a guy that I had a one night stand with a few weeks back." She added "He is a really cute guy that is in my Sociology class at school,we got together one night in his dorm after a few drinks.” She breathed deep one more time and said, “then there is a guy named Jeff that I really love but he is married to my best friend and we hooked up twice when she was out of town.” She looked up toward the ceiling and tears ran down her cheeks like a waterfall. I felt so sorry for her in this deep web of confusion she had spun with reckless abandon.

I was a little surprised just at the fact that she found the time and energy to be so ACTIVE, but I said nothing, I just smiled and patted her hand again to comfort her. She told me the worst thing of all is that the one she really loved was Jeff, her friend’s husband. 

She looked at me with big hopeless eyes as she asked, “What am I going to do Ms. Juanita?”

I sat there thinking, processing all of this information. There were 3 guys who were candidates as the possible “baby's daddy”. There were big complications with the one she had true feeling for, Jeff, who was married to her best friend. 

I remember my mind racing as I pondered the possible words of advice I would deliver to this young woman.

I believe that maybe a little alcohol makes a person lose prospective on the consequences and just go with what feels good. I get that. But this woman had a real twisted problem and I did not know how or even if, it could be untwisted.

I reasoned that, she did not know who the daddy was and there were multiple choices, therefore I felt it would be best not to tell any of the possible candidates for fatherhood yet.

I told her she really had no choice but to tell her parents at some point, the sooner the better. “Most likely they will turn out to be your biggest support system through all of this”, I told her.

After that night I did not see her or hear from her for years. She was on my mind for weeks and months but I realized I was just there for her to have someone to listen and to help her get some perspective on her situation. Yet, I was left to wonder and worry about how things turned out for her. I would hear little tidbits of information now and then. One night at a show, one of the people sitting at my table told us that she got married to a guy in her class and they had a baby boy who was now about 2 months old. That was such good information, I was so happy to hear it.

At least 15 years have passed since that day. I thought of this beautiful, confused young lady often. One of her friends filled me in recently at a gig. She completed college and became a high school teacher. She appeared to be happy and was still married to that guy from her Sociology class years ago.  Then one day, I bumped into them at Academy on Airport Boulevard and was so happy to see them. I noticed when I bumped into them, that her son looks identical to her husband. They even had the same mannerisms and smile. She said they had moved out of state about 10 years ago, following her husband's work. They were in town to visit her parents. It warmed my heart to see her and her little family.

Life is tough, confusing, fascinating and glorious. We can dig ourselves a big hole of seemingly unsurmountable problems, yet, if we gain our composure, regain our focus and work hard at it,  often things really can work out better than we ever dreamed. It may not always turn out like we planned, but it always turns out the way it was suppose to be.